When seeking a couples counselor in Orlando you should be prepared to engage in a process of self-reflection. Not only will you be learning ways to communicate with your spouse healthily, but you will also learn more about why you act or do certain things that can impact the relationship. Finding a couples counselor in Orlando can be the first challenge you face, but the lessons you learn about what it takes to have a happy marriage will benefit you more than you can imagine.
The many lessons you will learn in couples counseling in Orlando are among many, but one issue that will come up frequently is how to deal with being hurt. Couple’s counselors in Orlando have noted that during the therapeutic process, a term referred to as "noble hurt" will be something each partner will bring to light. This noble hurt is where one partner is fearful of sharing emotions or being vulnerable due to the severity and seriousness of their emotions. Rather than turning towards, which is the basic backbone of any couple’s therapy process in Orlando, the partner would rather turn away from their partner to protect them, not burden or overtly stress them. This begins the negative cycle in a relationship where one partner or the other will keep things inside to make sure that the partner can get what they need.
This is what is noted by your couple's counselor as a noble hurt and prevents intimacy, connection, and a positive relationship bond. The intention is noble to protect but it is hurting the relationship due to the partner not wanting to turn towards or express their emotional state thus leaving their significant other in the dark. This can cause that partner to develop higher anxious tendencies, develop negative overthinking and cognitive functioning, and strain the relationship more by reaching out for support.
If left untreated, the negative relationship cycle continues with the partner seeing this and focusing more on how to help instead of meeting them where they are. If a noble hurt is noticed in a relationship, speaking with a couple’s therapist in Orlando is a great step towards stopping this action and behavior. Couple’s therapy in Orlando can be geared towards working on the bridge of communication and having each partner come together on this bridge to provide safety and security with an emotionally safe place to be vulnerable. This is not easily learned and takes time for a partner to get to a place to want to meet on this emotional level. The most important thing to keep in mind is that while it is noble to want to protect a partner from emotional distress, more harm can be done by holding things in rather than sharing and trusting in the relationship.
Heather Oller is a licensed Orlando therapist at Orlando Thrive Therapy, Coaching & Counseling who specializes in counseling Orlando couples, individuals, and families who are seeking changes in their lives. She has been a mental health professional for over 17 years and is a practicing Orlando counselor that specializes in conflict resolution for couples. You can contact her for an appointment or call 407-592-8997 for more information.