Marriage conflict is inevitable, but it should not lead you to divorce. There are many ways to keep your marriage strong and healthy to avoid the D-word. Our expert on marriage counseling, Dr. Phillips, offers the following divorce prevention tips:
You can significantly improve the success of your marriage by devoting time exclusively to your spouse every day. For example, you can wake up a little earlier each day to reaffirm your love for one another by cuddling, making love, or having breakfast together. Take time out of every day to have meaningful conversations with one another, listen to each other's dreams and goals, show affection and appreciation for each other, talk about your relationship, or reflect on your successes and opportunities for growth.
People often make the mistake of believing that the things that make us feel loved and appreciated are the same things our spouse needs. For example, you may think that fresh flowers are a perfect gift, but your spouse may see them as a waste of money and allergy trigger. If you aren’t already aware, find out what your spouse needs and provide it lovingly without negative comments about how dumb it is to want a new set of screwdrivers, a picnic at the park, or dinner and a movie. Remember: The best gift you can give is something your spouse wants, not just something you want them to have.
One secret to a successful and fulfilling marriage is doing fun and exciting things together. Whether it's skiing, scuba diving, playing cards, bowling, ballroom dancing, or watching local sports, plan at least one activity a week that you both enjoy doing. If you have children, be sure that at least half of these activities are only for you and your spouse. This will help keep your marriage exciting and fun and give you an escape from the mundane.
Spending time apart to explore your own desires is just as essential as doing things together. So whether you take a gardening class while your spouse goes fishing or hit up yard sales while they play golf, allow each other room to grow independently. Besides, your separate interests will give you something interesting to talk about when spending time together.
Friendship is an essential element of any romantic relationship. Some critical aspects of a romantic friendship include knowing intimately, demonstrating respect and affection for each other daily, and genuinely enjoying one another’s company. Keep your friendship alive to ensure that your marriage stays healthy and strong.
Telling your spouse that you love them is especially crucial when you are not feeling loving sensations. During difficult times, actively generating love by choice will help you stay committed. Saying those three simple words and offering loving gestures will keep your hearts warm.
Practice these tips to keep your love alive and prevent the possibility of divorce. And when you need extra support through marriage counseling, Dr. Phillips can help. Contact us today to learn how counseling can keep your marriage healthy and strong.
Heather Oller is a licensed Orlando therapist at Orlando Thrive Therapy, Coaching & Counseling who specializes in counseling Orlando couples, individuals, and families who are seeking changes in their lives. She has been a mental health professional for over 17 years and is a practicing Orlando counselor that specializes in conflict resolution for couples. You can contact her for an appointment or call 407-592-8997 for more information.