I think it goes without saying that life is ever changing and there are so many unexpected things that can happen. This is just a common piece of life and it is how you address the unknowns that separates high peaks of anxiety symptoms and stress and a peaceful transition into putting yourself first. Asking yourself questions such as “how do I handle things out of my control” or “how do I stay on my own path” are great starts. The uncontrollable is just that - uncontrollable, and too much power to this can make you feel as though the world is small and you have no room to grow. Anxiety therapy can help teach you skills to better comprehend that power doesn't necessarily establish power.
The first step to this is understanding what is in your control as compared to what is out of your control. The uncontrollable can stem from you having questions or needing boundaries to be put into motion to give you a peaceful separation. In these situations, you have control over how you engage, what you respond with and how you respond to these external factors. “Things don’t go my way” you may be asking yourself but knowing “what I have power/control over” can give you the clarity you need. Even when you know what is in your control, even think one step ahead about what would still be in your control. Control is a major factor in anxiety related triggers, most anxiety counselors in Orlando utilize skills to find comfort as well as discomfort in control to shift toward acceptance.
One of the easiest things to do is to give up your power to the external world and allow the world factors to dictate how you think about yourself and how you act. Show the world who is boss! Show the world that you are powerful and that every decision and action you take from something that was unplanned is your choice. Choose to put yourself first, choose the best reality for yourself. Whether this be setting boundaries, asking questions, engaging with someone, you have this power, just don’t let anything take it! Finding a balance between what you can and cannot control while accepting both is the key to living a less anxiety-provoking life.
Heather Oller is a licensed Orlando therapist at Orlando Thrive Therapy, Coaching & Counseling who specializes in counseling Orlando couples, individuals, and families who are seeking changes in their lives. She has been a mental health professional for over 17 years and is a practicing Orlando counselor that specializes in conflict resolution for couples. You can contact her for an appointment or call 407-592-8997 for more information.