Connecting with others may seem like a challenge to you due to feeling as though you are missing something or unsure if you are even able to connect with people. Building an emotional connection with people is not an easy task and it takes time to do. One of the biggest things you may be thinking is “How are others looking at me or judging me?” or if a thought such as “No one seems to understand me and how I am” then emotional connection will be unable to be built because you are focused on meeting other's expectations. It is going to sound backward, but to build an emotional connection with others first requires building an emotional connection with yourself. Counselors in Orlando stress prioritizing a deeper connection with oneself.
This requires asking “What am I looking for in relationships?” There are so many different answers to this question but ideally, every relationship or connection you are looking for with others is rooted in the needs you have for connectivity and a sense of belonging. The idea that gets you into trouble is when you feel you have to submit someone else’s needs and put yours second. We are here to tell you that this is not the way. Think about what you’re looking for and think “how I am acting to achieve what I want”. If the answer comes back to where you are acting to benefit others, then you're optimizing others' needs and not your own and this can cause a gap in developing a true emotional connection. If you answer yourself, you are doing it because you want to and because the person you’re engaging with offers you what you need. This means you have just built an emotional connection with yourself and will come out and being more open to an emotional connection with that person and potentially others in the future.
There is no clear line that separates these two sides, and it can be very blurry at times - but that line is there, and it takes time to think and act this way which is why we at Orlando Thrive Therapy say practice makes perfect! A great start to this journey is establishing counseling in Orlando, where an hour is dedicated to your needs with an expert in emotional awareness. Remember the process to understanding oneself isn’t linear. Give us a call or email for more information.
Heather Oller is a licensed Orlando therapist at Orlando Thrive Therapy, Coaching & Counseling who specializes in counseling Orlando couples, individuals, and families who are seeking changes in their lives. She has been a mental health professional for over 17 years and is a practicing Orlando counselor that specializes in conflict resolution for couples. You can contact her for an appointment or call 407-592-8997 for more information.