An age old question relationship experts and marriage therapists in Orlando have gotten when working with couples is “how can I support my partner’s needs?” Now, when we are talking about the needs of an individual, we at Orlando Thrive are solely speaking to the five basic human needs that every individual has which are- fun, freedom, love and belonging, power and survival. It is these needs that every person strives for and these needs that your partner needs to have fulfilled.
Thinking about the needs your partner may have can be an opportunity to grow deeper in connection and commitment with one another. So now ask yourself “Do I know what is important to my partner?”. If you feel unsure then perhaps there is a conversation that needs to be had. Try using the five basic human needs and talk about what each of your needs are. List them out in order as you see fit for yourself and have your partner do the same thing. Then you each share what each of your needs are starting with the first one and then moving down the list. At each one, summarize and validate to your partner what they said about this need and why it is important to them. Ask them what it feels to have this need fulfilled and not fulfilled as this can provide insight into how they are feeling on a daily basis. These are tools marriage therapists in Orlando utilize to better comprehend the gap of communication and needs between partners.
Finally, ask your partner what you can do to support them in this need. The answer may be a straight forward, an unsure answer, or something that seems simplistic. In any case, that is what your partner is telling you and how you can give them support with fulfilling this need. Needs can change over time so try giving this a try with your partner and then as time goes on check in with one another and see if the needs have changed or remained the same. If they have changed, then try the conversation once more! People's needs continue to change throughout the life span, what makes a relationship successful is open communication and support through adversity. If you are having difficulty pinpointing or communicating your needs, speak to a marriage therapist or couple's counselor at Orlando Thrive Therapy today.
Heather Oller is a licensed Orlando therapist at Orlando Thrive Therapy, Coaching & Counseling who specializes in counseling Orlando couples, individuals, and families who are seeking changes in their lives. She has been a mental health professional for over 17 years and is a practicing Orlando counselor that specializes in conflict resolution for couples. You can contact her for an appointment or call 407-592-8997 for more information.