Creating a healthy relationship can be hard without the right help. Couples counseling helps people struggling in a marriage that is failing, or a relationship that has suffered trauma. By defining the healthy marriage circle, you can create a safe space that allows healing to occur.
Imagine someone giving you and your partner a piece of chalk and you use that chalk to draw a circle around you both. That circle is invisible to the world except the two of you.
A big struggle that couples have in their relationship revolves around their connection. They are unable to draw the circle together and allow external factors to penetrate the lines of their marriage circle thus having them both create their individualized circles. When this happens, the couple becomes out of sync, miscommunication happens, the pronoun “we” is replaced with “I” and those two independent circles begin to get farther and farther apart.
In a relationship (dating, marriage, civil, etc.) it is imperative that the couple is able to push out all external influence from their relationship and come together in this circle with only one agenda: the relationship. The circle is not meant for blaming, or saying how a partner needs to be “fixed” but instead has the questions asked:
This is easier said than done but ultimately comes down to the choices the couple makes in the circle and what they choose to address and talk about. Orlando couples counseling focuses on being in this circle and opening the doors of the relationship. This allows it to transcend past individual needs and develop a unified need. Once this happens, the unified need is met and the couple's individuals needs in the relationship follow.
A good way to try this with your partner is to pick a quiet place in the house and sit close together. Have questions written down as a guideline to start the marriage circle. After time and practice, the couple will be able to handle any situation that is thrown at their relationship. Seeking couples counseling provides expert help with this step and teaches couples how to master this ability to communicate. If you are struggling with your partner to enter the circle, and some couples do, then acknowledge it together. Understand that there are other ways such as coming to an appointment with a couple's counselor that you can overcome relationship barriers quickly.
Heather Oller is a licensed Orlando therapist at Orlando Thrive Therapy, Coaching & Counseling who specializes in counseling Orlando couples, individuals, and families who are seeking changes in their lives. She has been a mental health professional for over 17 years and is a practicing Orlando counselor that specializes in conflict resolution for couples. You can contact her for an appointment or call 407-592-8997 for more information.