Couples Therapy Orlando and seven ways to fix a relationship. Navigating a relationship can feel like hard work sometimes, but when you are in a healthy relationship it can have a positive impact on all areas in your life. A healthy relationship requires good communication, awareness and attention to each other’s needs, and a willingness to change when things need to be adjusted. There are areas you can start working on now to improve your relationship. Here are seven ways you can begin making positive changes for your relationship today:
Jumping to conclusions is the surest way to start off with unhealthy dialogue. When you start to assume things about your partner or think you can read their minds, you set yourself up for negative thinking. Make sure to stay in the present moment and take all things into consideration before you make accusations, get angry, or retaliate. Be realistic and try to remember that your partner is not your enemy and their goal in life is not to upset you.
Anytime you catch yourself saying something like, “He should know what to do,” or “She should have called me by now,” or “ He should know what I need,” you are setting yourself up for disappointment. When your relationship is in trouble, check in with what you are telling yourself. “Should” statements place expectations on things that come from your own past or experiences. Accepting that things just are what they are will help you find a way to see that you can establish what works for your individual relationship, not by anyone else’s standards.
Not everything will go well all the time. In a healthy relationship, focusing on the positive benefits everyone. If either of you are only remembering the negative moments, it will make it harder to start each day with a positive mindset about the relationship. You have to be able to look at all the positive’s and minimize the negatives for a healthy relationship. One way to do this is to challenge yourself to acknowledge gratitude daily to your partner and always look for things they do right.
Thing’s aren’t always black and white. Remember that lie is about being flexible and open-minded. This applies to a healthy relationship too. Finding the gray area and negotiating things with each other improves your connection. It also allows you to be more accepting with one another and opens up a safe place for personal and relationship growth.
Just because your partner forgets to call you when they said they would, doesn’t mean they are “thoughtless.” Labeling a person because of a specific behavior sours the goal of having a healthy relationship. It also implies that there is no hope for change. Be careful not to place negative labels which give your mind negative feedback towards your partner when it could just be a simple behavior you don’t like that they can easily change. The next time you experience an action from your partner you don’t like, just talk to them about it. Tell them how it makes you feel and see if there’s a way to do things differently next time.
Don’t assume that just because you feel something it has to be true. Drs John and Julie Gottman invented the Sound Relationship House and identified common trends in successful couples. One of those trends was the ability to have positive regard for your partner despite your own personal feelings. You can learn ways to self-soothe and resolve conflict peacefully even if you are experiencing very negative emotions.
You are not the only one responsible for everything in the relationship. Be careful you don’t become a martyr and begin to victimize yourself. This can be a sign of co-dependency and severely threaten a healthy relationship. While it may only take one person to change the dynamics of a relationship, there are still two people. When each person accepts personal responsibility that can allow for individual growth which will positively impact the relationship as a whole.
Finding tools to be a health couple can be hard. There aren’t any road maps provided for how to manage a healthy relationship. Look for the following aspects in your relationship to know if you have what it takes to be a great couple:
You deserve to be a great couple and have the relationship of your dreams. There are specific things that can help any couple get better. Learn new communication skills and improve connection with couple’s therapy. The more time you wait, the longer things don’t get resolved. Learn more about each other and find better ways to do things. Call today to find out how couples therapy works and how it can help you.
Heather Oller is a licensed Orlando therapist at Orlando Thrive Therapy, Coaching & Counseling who specializes in counseling Orlando couples, individuals, and families who are seeking changes in their lives. She has been a mental health professional for over 17 years and is a practicing Orlando counselor that specializes in conflict resolution for couples. You can contact her for an appointment or call 407-592-8997 for more information.