Getting what you need out of a relationship doesn’t have to be hard. There are so many couples that make being in love look so easy. They seem to just “get” each other, laugh a lot, have passion, and even attraction after years of marriage or being together.
They still seem to be friends, enjoy each other’s company, and they truly still seem to like one another.
Maybe you are in a relationship that is lacking something, but you aren’t sure what it is. Maybe you are wondering how to get the romance back, to fire the spark again, or to how to tap back into that foundation that was there not too long ago.
How do the Master couples do it? What are their tricks? As an individual therapist in Orlando, who also works with couples, I can honestly say that the “tricks” are not as elusive as you may think.
Here are a few things I’ve noticed.
I have come to notice that successful couples are kind to one another even when they aren’t getting along. They can look past a disagreement and see through to their partner and teammate. They do not let a difference of opinion overshadow love, respect, or fondness. As a matter of fact, the successful couples can even lean in to disputes with curiosity. They quite often manage to have healthy debates that end in a hand shake, a kiss, a hug, or even more.
Picking a life partner doesn’t mean you are “stuck” with someone. It means that you choose someone. The couples who seem happy, laugh often, enjoy time together, and have a true friendship, do it by choice. They do not feel it is a chore or burden to be with their life mate and they are happy that they were chosen in return.
Humor is always present in successful couples. They know that there is great trust, mutual admiration, and a deep love. When they joke with one another or offer constructive feedback, feelings are not hurt easily. They can laugh at one another, and together, even during tough times.
The couples that seem so comfortable, and easy with each other, share one major thing. They are confident in their unconditional acceptance and love for one another. They do not judge, criticize, belittle, or ridicule one another. They build each other up, share in their successes, and support one another, even if they have different ideas.
The happy, healthy couples value the time they have with one another. They put each other first and consider each other’s needs. They are sensitive to one another and truly want to be in each other’s company. They do their best to manage distractions that take away energy from the relationship. They do not let things in that challenge their commitment to one another, or could potentially drive a wedge between their bond. After time, a healthy couple seems to just know when they need time together and they don’t feel bad asking one another for it.
Healthy couples know how to manage their relationship along with other important things in their life. As hard as it is as an individual therapist in Orlando to teach about healthy boundaries, it is such an important thing to learn. Couples that don’t have to struggle with co-dependency issues experience less insecurity, less jealousy issues, less problems with trust, and feel more secure in their bond.
Healthy couples just know what their partners need to feel loved. Even if things don’t happen naturally sometimes, each partner is committed to learning what the other person needs. They ask questions, they commit to change, and they look forward to receiving the same in return.
For any relationship to be happy, healthy and whole, there has to be a solid foundation. That foundation is what keeps couples together. It doesn’t always need two people to understand how to make a relationship work. As an individual therapist in Orlando, it can be very helpful to teach one person in a relationship common traits healthy couples have. In relationships, even when one person talks to an individual therapist in Orlando, they might come away with a better perspective about how to love better than they thought before. Orlando Thrive Therapy can help and you can start by calling 407-592-8997 today.
Heather Oller is a licensed Orlando therapist at Orlando Thrive Therapy, Coaching & Counseling who specializes in counseling Orlando couples, individuals, and families who are seeking changes in their lives. She has been a mental health professional for over 17 years and is a practicing Orlando counselor that specializes in conflict resolution for couples. You can contact her for an appointment or call 407-592-8997 for more information.