Questions to Ask Your Marriage Counselor

Questions to Ask Your Marriage Counselor

Questions to Ask Your Marriage Counselor

 

Deciding to start marriage counseling is a significant and courageous step. It shows a commitment to your relationship and a willingness to work through challenges together. But finding the right counselor is just as important as the decision to go. The connection you and your partner have with your therapist can profoundly impact your progress.

To ensure you find the best fit, it's essential to treat your first session like an interview. This is your opportunity to understand the counselor's methods, experience, and approach to therapy. Asking the right questions can give you confidence that you’re entrusting your relationship to a capable professional who aligns with your needs.

This guide provides a comprehensive list of questions to ask a potential marriage counselor. It will help you gather the information you need to make an informed decision and start your therapy journey on the right foot, whether you're looking for marriage counseling in Orlando, FL, or anywhere else.

Questions About Experience and Qualifications

First, you need to be sure the counselor is qualified and has the right experience to help with your specific situation. These questions will help you understand their professional background.

What are your credentials and what licenses do you hold?

In Florida (FL), mental health professionals must be licensed to practice. Look for credentials like Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), Licensed Mental Health Counselor (LMHC), or Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW). These licenses ensure the therapist has met specific educational and training requirements.

How much experience do you have with couples counseling?

While a general therapist might offer couples counseling, a specialist often has more focused training and experience. Ask what percentage of their practice is dedicated to couples. A therapist who primarily works with couples will likely have a deeper understanding of relationship dynamics.

What is your experience with our specific issues?

Every couple's challenges are unique. Be open about the primary issues you're facing, whether they are communication breakdowns, infidelity, financial stress, intimacy issues, or parenting disagreements. Ask the counselor if they have experience and a successful track record in helping couples navigate these particular problems.

Questions About the Counselor's Approach

Every therapist has a unique style and theoretical orientation. Understanding their approach will help you determine if it's a good match for you and your partner.

What is your therapeutic approach to marriage counseling?

Therapists use various methods. Some common approaches in couples counseling include:

  • The Gottman Method: This approach is based on decades of research and focuses on building friendship, managing conflict, and creating shared meaning.
  • Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT): EFT helps couples understand and change their emotional responses to each other, fostering a more secure bond.
  • Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT): This technique helps couples identify and change negative thought patterns and behaviors that contribute to conflict.

Ask the counselor to explain their primary method in simple terms. See if their philosophy resonates with what you hope to achieve.

How do you structure your counseling sessions?

Understanding the session format can help set expectations. Ask about the length of sessions (typically 50-90 minutes) and what a typical session looks like. Will you meet together for the entire session, or will there be individual breakout time? Will the therapist assign "homework" or exercises to practice between sessions?

What is your stance on separation or divorce?

It’s crucial to know your counselor's perspective on this topic. A neutral counselor will not push you toward staying together or separating. Instead, their goal should be to help you and your partner find clarity and make the best decision for your future, whatever that may be. They should support the goals you set for your relationship.

How will you handle it if one of us feels unheard?

In couples counseling, it's common for one partner to feel that the therapist is "siding" with the other. A skilled counselor knows how to manage this dynamic. They should be able to explain how they ensure both partners feel heard, validated, and equally supported throughout the process.

Questions About Logistics and Expectations

Practical details are just as important. These questions cover the logistics of starting and continuing therapy.

What are your session fees and do you accept insurance?

Finances are a practical and important consideration. Ask about the cost per session and what payment methods are accepted. If you plan to use health insurance, confirm if they are in-network with your provider. If not, ask if they can provide a superbill for you to submit to your insurance company for potential out-of-network reimbursement.

How often do you recommend we have sessions?

Most marriage counselors suggest weekly sessions, at least initially, to build momentum. As you make progress, you might switch to bi-weekly or monthly meetings. Discuss what the therapist recommends for your situation.

How long does marriage counseling typically last?

The duration of therapy varies greatly depending on the couple's issues and goals. Some couples may benefit from short-term counseling (a few months), while others with more deep-seated issues may need longer-term support. Ask the counselor for a general estimate, but understand that this can change as therapy progresses.

What can we expect to achieve?

While no counselor can guarantee specific results, they should be able to outline what progress could look like. This might include improved communication, better conflict resolution skills, a deeper emotional connection, or clarity about the future of your relationship. Setting realistic expectations from the start is key to a positive experience.

Start Your Journey to a Healthier Relationship

Choosing a marriage counselor is a deeply personal decision. By asking these questions, you empower yourself to find a professional who not only has the right skills but also feels like the right partner in your journey toward a stronger, healthier relationship. The goal is to find someone you and your partner both trust and feel comfortable with.

If you are seeking marriage counseling in Orlando, FL, the team at Orlando Thrive Therapy is here to help. Our experienced and compassionate therapists are dedicated to supporting couples as they navigate challenges and build a more fulfilling life together. Contact Orlando Thrive Therapy today to schedule a consultation or to learn more about how we can support you and your partner.

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(407) 592-8997

216 Pasadena Pl
Orlando, Florida 32803
Heather Oller

Heather Oller is the owner and founder of Orlando Thrive Therapy, Coaching, and Counseling. She is a licensed counselor and a family mediator who has over 23 years of dedicated work as a professional in the mental health field. Through her company's mission, she continues to pave the way for future therapists, and their clients, who want a higher quality of life....and who want to thrive, rather than just survive. You can contact Orlando Thrive Therapy at (407) 592-8997 for more information.