Individual counseling Orlando provides objective feedback to a problem. It will help you look at situations through a different angle. It helps to see if what you are perceiving about a situation is actually reality.

You can also start by asking someone if what you heard them say is what they actually said. Sounds easy enough, but this is a tough one for some people. Here’s an example: Your wife says to you, “You forgot to call me today when you said you would.” Do you hear what she actually said or do you hear something like this,”You just don’t care about me and you never do anything right?” Lets assume for arguments sake that your wife actually did say the former and not the later.

Often what we hear people say is filtered through a sum of our own life experiences and if we don’t take time to inspect the filter or adjust it we can react to situations harshly. We can suppress and harbor negative emotions based on our perceptions of events rather than on reality. Instead of stewing and brewing, or reacting and walking away, ask the question, “I heard you say I am worthless. Is that what you said?” And hopefully the response you get is, “Absolutely not. I was just looking forward to hearing from you.”

• Thirdly, communicate with your partner what it is you find after your self-reflection. Why do you think you have been suppressing things or reacting in ways you aren’t proud of? Tell them what your fears are about talking things out or expressing your thoughts. Give them the explanation, but don’t make excuses or use this information as a way to avoid making behavioral changes and continuing to gain awareness. If your goal is to have healthy, thriving, open relationships with people, then you need to keep being honest with yourself, and them, and constantly be adjusting your filter.

It takes a lot of physical and mental energy to hold a force inside. The same thing that happens to the boiling pot could be happening to you. When you reach your threshold and you start to boil over, how does this come out for you? Do you yell or throw a fit over stupid things? Do you do something self sabotaging to avoid negative emotions such as use substances, over eat or over spend? Do you withhold affection from your partner or isolate yourself, maybe give a cold shoulder? The energy you are spending to find ways to suppress what your negative emotions is more time consuming, emotionally draining and physically harmful to you then what would actually happen if you faced the issue head on. Reach out for help to find better ways of handling your relationships, and creating a better relationship with yourself too.